I wrote this letter many months ago but haven’t had a chance to post it. For that reason the photos don’t really match the letter, but I’m posting it anyway. I love the letter, I love the photos and above all I love the sweet boy that they showcase. I had every intention of going outdoors for out little shoot, but after walking outside for a few seconds and feeling that crazy cold wind we were both agreed that this shoot would be taking place indoors. It worked out perfectly because we got the idea to include his bass and he couldn’t of been happier about that.
Jonathan, Jon, Buddy, Jon-Jin,
You have my heart sweet boy. Whenever I need a little pick me up I know I can count on you. A quick squeeze always results an, “I love you so much mommy” from you and it’s the most genuine I love you from your sweet little heart. If I had to sum you up in one word it would be “sweet”. Anyone that knows you would say the same.
Along with sweet you are the strongest little boy I know. Recently we had some friends over and you met their kids for the first time. I adore how quickly you make friends and how accepting you are of others. He was a little bit older than you and bigger. He also takes Jujitsu classes. You guys decided that a wrestling match was in order. Both of you are tough boys and both of you super determined. No fear. At one point you both ran at each other straight on and we thought for sure it was going to result in some blood or at very least tears, nope you both just kept on. You fought with all your might but we could see you starting to get tired and the feeling of being the underdog was something that didn’t sit well with you. You were staying tough but your dad and I could see you breaking down inside a bit. After they left we sat down and talked with you and with held back tears you told us that you wanted to learn to fight like him. In a way we could tell that you thought less of yourself and you thought we felt the same. We told you over and over how very proud we were of you and how strong we thought you were. And it was all true, we were blown away with how much of a beating you can take, you are one tough little guy and as soon as we can we are getting you into wrestling!
Your “tough guy” side made it’s presence again when you fell off the monkey bars at school. No tears, just a trip to the nurses indicated that something was not right with your wrist. An ER visit was in order. The Dr. was sure you had broken both your wrist bones, thankfully it was just one. Again no tears, just an impressive tolerance for pain as the Dr. and nurse commented on how adults wouldn’t even be this tough.
You might be able to take a punch but your heart is about as soft as they come. When you misbehave and realize that you have maybe hurt someone it affects you deeply. You come to me with huge tears in your eyes and with the biggest apology, making sure I know how sorry you are. You have such a need to make things right when you’ve done wrong. There have been times that I’ve gone to tuck you in at night and you wrap your arms around me and apologize for something you maybe did wrong that morning.
You are the hardest worker. Always the first one to offer your help with chores, carrying in grocery’s (this past week with one arm), take out garbage and feed the dogs. When I ask you to do something the reply from you I get is, “I’m on it.” I love you work ethic, it’s contagious.
You are our movie man. You have always loved movies and are set on being a superhero actor when you get older. Or Cake Boss. Or work with your daddy. It’s very difficult to get your attention when you are watching t.v. or playing your DS. It is one thing we have to keep tabs on you with because you would be glued to a screen 24/7. It’s always, “One more level Mom” or “Just after this show Mom.”
We have recently started letting your hair grow, rather than buzzing it. You make sure it’s gelled and styled every morning before school. Nana has been helping you now that you’re right arm is unavailable. Your cuteness is over the top with your little hairstyle.
You are my clean cut kid, slightly OCD like your mama, but something I really appreciate about you. Your bed is usually made, your clothes clean and your collectables all in order. On the flip side you don’t like when things are not going the way you thought they should. Change and transition can be a bit difficult for you, I would say you get that from Nana. But this year you have made huge strides in that area and especially at school. You used to cry a lot last year in school because it was difficult for you to move on to something new if you hadn’t completed the task in front of you. You wanted to have that sense of completion before you were asked to move on. This year you have come home each day and informed me, “Mom I don’t cry at school anymore!”
Honestly Jon, sometimes I feel like my heart is going to burst when I think about how much I love you. You truly have my heart and I feel beyond blessed to be your mom. To be the one to guide you through this life. I pray that you will continue to have that overwhelming sense of love about you. That your love for God would never waiver and you would always be as bold about your love for Him as you are now. I pray that you would be a man of integrity and one that always puts others before yourself. You have a bright future ahead of you sweet boy, just keep on being you!
With all my love,